DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
