i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
