dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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