I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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