So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
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He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
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I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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