I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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