One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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