How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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