so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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