I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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