Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
how does that bad decision feel?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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