Texts From Last Night

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  (913): View more from Kansas

  end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?

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  (913): end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket? http://tfl.nu/fo6s
  Replies (5) Good night (925) Bad night (764)
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  (212): View more from New York

  i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light

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  (212): i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light http://tfl.nu/ogwp
  Replies (9) Good night (698) Bad night (2700)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.

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  (919): I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all. http://tfl.nu/fj96
  Replies (7) Good night (3161) Bad night (1033)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.

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  (610): Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever. http://tfl.nu/x9w2
  Replies (33) Good night (1043) Bad night (4331)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund

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  (614): ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund http://tfl.nu/czuk
  Replies (8) Good night (2649) Bad night (1412)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.

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  (919): He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great. http://tfl.nu/il4g
  Replies (4) Good night (2513) Bad night (1058)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again

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  (978): No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again http://tfl.nu/wayk
  Replies (1) Good night (934) Bad night (497)
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  (530): View more from California

  I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP

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  (530): I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP http://tfl.nu/mtep
  Replies (6) Good night (1335) Bad night (604)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone

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  (678): I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone http://tfl.nu/6u3c
  Replies (2) Good night (952) Bad night (500)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.

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  (613): You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you. http://tfl.nu/xki1
  Replies (6) Good night (1879) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock

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  (406): I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock http://tfl.nu/wbdd
  Replies (9) Good night (2075) Bad night (797)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.

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  (519): He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat. http://tfl.nu/pqit
  Replies (10) Good night (1430) Bad night (497)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.

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  (248): PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW. http://tfl.nu/5tmy
  Replies (7) Good night (1135) Bad night (419)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that

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  (775): I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that http://tfl.nu/rttq
  Replies (1) Good night (390) Bad night (491)
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  (760): View more from California

  Mom just told me I need to start having sex.

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  (760): Mom just told me I need to start having sex. http://tfl.nu/r76g
  Replies (4) Good night (490) Bad night (341)

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