Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."

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(609): View more from New Jersey

i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.

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(914): View more from New York

I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.

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(323): View more from California

I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(201): View more from New Jersey

she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.

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(619): View more from California

Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.

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(419): View more from Ohio

I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.

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