Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
