He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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