dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
smell my finger.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I am naked and annoyed.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
