Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize