Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
