No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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