I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
