Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
They should really pass out barf bags in church
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
