new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
They took my balls.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Randomize
