remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
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