She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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