She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
