Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize