Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Need sex. Gaining weight.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
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