They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
