I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
