P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
