Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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