The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
