Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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