dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I think pants incapable of making pants work