Whod you bang
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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