I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
