So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
