Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
