He kissed a someone with a penis
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
