Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
We left the knife in your bed.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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