i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
