Cold hands, warm shart.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
