using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
