Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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