hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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