i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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