Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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