you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
