Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
