his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
