I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize